
Rushen “Who am I” Analytical Meditation
Featuring works by: T. E. ANG, Divya, Katharina Eisenberg- Kunst und Klartext, Aleksandr Gordeev, FC Henryl, Gunzi Holmström, Allie Joy, Lim Yu Cheng, Kazmier Maslanka, Sudhir Pillai, Linda Wright Be In Awe
Arranged by: Jennifer Teo
The text in this section is taken from Awakening to the Sacred by Lama Surya Das, where he shares the practice of rushen.
Tibetan Buddhism includes a remarkable practice of self-inquiry and analysis that addresses the timeless “Who am I?” question. It is designed to help seekers gain understanding and insight and get at the truth of what we are, as opposed to what we appear to be and what we would like to be—what we tell ourselves we are. The practice is called “rushen”, which is literally translated as “discerning the difference between”. The practice of rushen takes the question of “Who am I … What am I?” to a new and deeper level.
I think rushen is absolutely one of the very best and most effective ways for Westerners to meditate since it so skillfully uses the analytical mental faculty to help us go beyond the self. This trenchant analysis helps us delve deeply and plumb beneath and beyond intellectual processes; it helps us break free from illusions and misconceptions about ourselves.
RUSHEN “WHO AM I” ANALYTICAL MEDITATION
The purpose of rushen is to help you peel away the layers ad layers of persona and conditioned behaviour covering up your inner light, your luminescent Buddha-nature. Rushen will actually help you discern, or differentiate, the real from the unreal—your real nature from your persona.
Begin this meditation by asking yourself, “Who or what am I?”
Then begin to examine one by one all the labels that you or someone else might apply. Take the time to consider and answer each question. Don’t limit yourself to these questions; create others that reflect your life.
Who am I?
Am I really just me? Really, and only, me? What is my name?
Am I a man? Am I a woman?
Am I anything else?
Am I a father, mother, sister, brother, child, aunt, uncle, niece, cousin?
Am I a teacher, carpenter, plumber, lawyer, social worker, student? (Name your own occupation)
Am I a member of a community, a committee member, churchgoer, meditator, sangha member?
Am I a voter? Am I a Democrat, Republican, Conservative, Liberal, Independent?
Am I someone’s friend? An I someone’s enemy?
Am I the image I project to the world? Am I a casual dresser, a spiffy dresser? Am I neat? Am I sloppy?
Am I someone who drives a big car, small car, truck? Am I anything else? What are the labels I use to describe myself? Who am I, really?
Now take this exercise deeper.
Who or what is asking these questions?
What am I experiencing at the present moment? Am I bored, tired, curious, confused, happy?
Why am I feeling what I feel right now? What do I feel?
What sounds do I hear right now in the present moment?
What sights do I see?
Take whatever presents itself in your field of awareness—whether it be a sight, a sound, or a physical sensation and take it apart, a little at a time. What is that sound? For example. Is it outside of myself? Is it in my ear? Is it in my mind? Or is it an interaction between all three—the perceiver, the object, and the interaction among them?
Where is my experiences occurring? Is it in the head, the gut, the heart, the mind, the body?
We know that having ears alone isn’t enough to hear. You also need auditory consciousness. After all, a corpse can’t hear even though it has ears. As we pull back the well-placed defensive ego layers, some thick and some thin, we eventually arrive at the point where we realise that consciousness is the most fundamental, lowest primary denominator.
Ask yourself if you can experience something before it arises, before you conceptualize and label it. Can you, for example, hear a sound before you name it? Can you reach deeply enough into who you are so that you have the barest, most direct perception of sound without labels or thoughts? Just pure sound, unmediated by thoughts, concepts, or judgments.
What we are doing is trying to look in to the nature of perception and knowing. Who is doing the labeling? Who is thinking “I like it” or “I don’t like it”? How do we know, feel, and think? Notice through direct self-observation how impulse, volitional activity, will, and the like arise and drive us around.
Ask yourself, What do I think of myself? What are the labels I apply to me, here and now in the present moment? Do I see myself as competent, incompetent, unworthy, or so deserving that I’m positively entitled? Do I see myself as a victim? Ask yourself, Is this all I am? Is there nothing more to me than meets the eye?
Are any of these labels remainders from past experiences? Ask yourself why you are holding on to these labels or images. What are the effects of holding on to the old tapes—audio and video recordings from the past? Who or what am I? In a nutshell, who or what is experiencing my experience right now? Sense it directly.
Discernment is a key facet of wisdom and spiritual intelligence. As we practice rushen, we try to find and get down to authentic presence—our own truth, our own reality. This is a profound Tibetan Dharma practice of the Dzongchen tradition, part of the masters’ introduction to the nature of mind. This intensive self-inquiry asks us to emply our discriminating awareness through a process of elimination—not this, not just that—to recognise all the things we are not. By so doing we get closer to our inner light and what we truly are.
Many people who do this meditation say: “But I didn’t find anything”. In fact, this is the usual response. This is the bad news, but it’s also the good news! If we can strip away enough, we arrive at a new beginning. Sometimes this sense that nothing is there lasts only a moment, but even that can be enough to get a renewed sense of freedom, openness, and truth. This is how we can begin the transformation process from the old notions of self that we drag around with us like so much extra baggage. This is one of the best Dharma practices for delving into the conundrum of self and not self. In this way, we can experience our transpersonal nature—our Authentic Being. That’s greater than any of those bits and pieces that we usually identify with as being the self. There’s a lot of freedom and delight in that, I assure you. This is a way to be a born-again Buddha—or Authentic You-dah.
Look deeply within yourself. I think you might like what you find.
The following section contains some new submissions which are relevant to this meditation.
Wayang stick puppets No. 1 The goddess - She knows everything, embodying calm wisdom and grace - Element ether | Katharina Eisenberg- Kunst und Klartext | Acrylic on canvas | 2019 | This series depicts various archetypes as puppets, inspired by the Indonesian shadow theatre - the plays of the Wayang cult. My grandmother grew up in Sumatra and later had some original wayang dolls at home. These have fascinated me and inspired me to my own interpretation, which includes archetypes based on the elements. it takes all the elements to be a whole, because each individual quality is as important as the other and they need each other.
9 Bodies | Aleksandr Gordeev | Digital illustration | 2022 | As a yoga practitioner, I learned that in addition to the Western way of looking at anatomy, there is also a more subtle, energetic anatomy to awaken to. In Kundalini Yoga, we each have three mental bodies and six energy bodies, and our physical body. 1 Soul body, 2 Negative mind, 3 Positive mind, 4 Neutral mind, 5 Physical body, 6 Arcline, 7 Aura, 8 Pranic body, 9 Subtle body and 10 Radiant body. This illustration is my first attempt to picture them, how I feel they might look.
Self Portrait | Divya | Mixed media on canvas | 2022 | This work is an inside joke. To any observer, it would appear that the sketched face is what I identify with but this would be incorrect. I often cannot recognise my own face which has been glued onto the surface of this work in the same way I relate to it sometimes - superficially - while the rest of the work I feel is more 'me,' more 'I'. But that too, in just the fleeting moment of creating it, just one corner of the expanse that is within me, that is within all of us.
There is a fire in me | Gunzi Holmström | Oil on canvas | 2022 |
True Self | FC Henryl | Watercolour on paper | 2022 | The chinese character 我 symbolizes the true self that is not defined by senses or worldly roles, hence its predominance white. Its boundaries are defuse symbolizing the true self union with the universe. The character's reflection consist of 4 silhouette of a child, man, woman and elderly. This signifies how the true self is constant regardless of age or different rebirths. It also signifies the consistency of true self despite differences in masculine or feminine traits. It also signifies, how the self is made up of different others we come across in life, but the true self transcend different version of the self. The lower portion of the artwork is made up of red, orange and yellow dots resembling the material world, while the upper portion is defuse yellow resembling the spiritual realm.
Sikhona | Allie Joy | Projection sculpture | 2014 | Sikhona, a powerful greeting meaning “I am here”. Inspired by the African language Zulu, it validates being seen for one who is present. Using retinal photography, this work speaks of the physical aspect of seeing someone and the nerves involved in this energetic exchange. The physical and metaphysical are a mirror of each other.
10,000 Dharmas | Kazmier Maslanka | Digital Art executed as a Lamba Duratrans and mounted in a backlit frame | 2013 | Chapter thirty-one of the Diamond Sutra inspired me to concern myself with the concept: "We are all made of the same substance.” The great Korean Zen master Seung Sahn Sunim puts it this way: "In the big cookie factory we call earth, there are many kinds of cookies. They take many different shapes and have different names, but they are all made from the same dough. Because they are all made from the same material we can make God, we can make Buddha, we can make Demon, we can make Satan. The myriad things in our world all have different names and forms, but the taste is the same. Even people come in many different shapes and colors: western people, Chinese people, Korean people. They all have a different appearance, but their substance is the same. So, the Buddha said, "Above is the dwelling place of all Buddhas, below is the six realms, and all have the same substance. One by one, everything is complete; one by one, everything has it. One by one, everything interpenetrates everything else. One by one, each thing is complete." The thought crossed my mind that even the most disgusting creatures are the same as myself and anything divided by itself equals one. (The Chinese character inside the 1 reads as: “Buddha’s Mind”) The title points to the ancient Chinese kong-an: "10,000 Dharmas return to One. Where does the One return?" [Note: the concept of 10,000 is equal to infinity in ancient Chinese] An interesting thing to ponder is what happens when one puts themselves (self) in the denominator and "take the limit" of self while approaching zero? In other words, when one makes the value of the self "zero"* the result turns the "one" (Buddha's Mind) into infinity - thus returning infinity to the one.
Discourse on Self beyond Self | T. E. ANG | Mixed media on canvas | 2019 | The artwork examines the layers of ‘Self’ through representational deconstruction of human body components such as hands, feet and thumbs. Alternative ideas of ‘Self in Context’, ‘Observing Self’ and ‘Self Energy’, are also expounded in contemporary psychological therapeutic modalities, such as Acceptance Commitment Therapy (ACT); and Internal Family Systems (IFS) and seen as analogous to that of spiritual perspectives of ‘True Self’, which is beyond a physical body or separate unchanging entity, and instead, inherently interconnected with the larger collective consciousness and universal systems.
Loss of Self | Sudhir Pillai | Acrylic on canvas | 2022 | Shut your eyes and reflect within and there will not be any face and body. The loss of the ego identification is the first step towards recognizing the non self. Everything de-merges away till nothing emerges and that's when peace walks in. One has to float, not try to find the bottom.
Untitled | Lim Yu Cheng | Acrylic on canvas | 2021 | This is my painting of a scenery of lotuses in a pond at dawn. The water is undisturbed and there is a slight mist surrounding the pond. I enjoy the peace and calm feeling from this lotus pond scenery. I hope it will be helpful for anyone who needs a reminder to breathe deep and find stillness in our hectic life.
Clear Awareness | Linda Wright Be In Awe | Digital painting (Procreate) | 2022 |